we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
