I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
Randomize
