Having a random hookup so left but love u
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
Randomize
