Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
Randomize