don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
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