Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
Randomize
