Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
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