Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
Randomize
