All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
I am unfriending an ex-one night stand because his profile picture is of his wife's ultrasound.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
Randomize
