like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize
