if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
