I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
Randomize
