One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
