apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
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