Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
Randomize
