walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
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