Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
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