singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
Randomize
