Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
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