My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
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