He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
Randomize
