Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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