is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
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