i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
i was born a porn star she said
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
Randomize
