I cockslap morals
last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
it hurts more in the daytime
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How was your sisters wedding?
Oh, I didn't go. I slept through my alarm. I finally woke up and was like...I don't think so.
sisterhood ftl.
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
Don't EVER smell your tampon
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
Randomize