You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize
