Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Come home. Im drunk and cutting my own hair. This is bad, i need you.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
Randomize
