i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
Randomize
