The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
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