i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
