i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
Randomize
