i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
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