But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
