Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Randomize
