wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
Randomize
