I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
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