I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
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