Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize