i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Randomize
