how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
Randomize
