Just mADE A PArabola og urine
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
Randomize
