Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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