You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
Randomize
