Rock
Scissors
Fuck
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize
