But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Randomize
