You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Randomize
