its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
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