You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Randomize
