Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
