the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
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