Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Randomize
